Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Momentary Escapes (revised)

Because my life is so packed, so busy, so full of people and noise 12-15 hours each day, I have to find ways to escape the cacaphony that surrounds me, if only for a moment or two. Until this school year, music was my primary way of escape. Tucked away in my classroom, isolated from the rest of the school, I did have quiet every hour and a half or so (we teach on a block schedule, so I had at least one 80-minute block to myself each day). I was able to study, grade papers, plan for the next class or the following day in peace and quiet...spurred on by the music of my mood. Mostly classical, some contemporary. But always soothing, always empowering.

But this year, as principal/teacher, the only time I am in my classroom is when I'm teaching. Otherwise, I'm in my office, the hub of the EW/GBA universe. It is almost never quiet and I am almost never alone. Music is not always a possibility, as people are constantly in and out, needing to talk, needed to be talked to, needing anything but quiet. So I have visual escapes instead. Pictures fill the walls, and plants line the window sill. Visuals that literally take me away as each has a personal connection, specific experience connected to it.

My computer's wallpaper is a picture of Grieg's composing hut at his home in Bergen, Norway. Not only is it a beautiful picture, but it reminds me of the amazing family vacation we took last summer. Opposite my desk is a bulletin board with a calendar and some pictures of Provence, France that remind s me of the equally amazing solitary vacation I took two summers ago. Next to this is a painting I bought in Norway.

On the wall behind me are three paintings and a framed needlepoint quote by Emerson that my sister Lauren made for me several years ago. I bought one of the paintings in France at an outdoor art show. There is a still life of music, books and antique recorder. The large painting is a copy of a Winslow Homer painting set in Maine that has soothing colors. On the wall opposite my desk is another needlepoint quote from my favorit hymn "Be Still, my Soul." To the left of my desk is a picture window that looks out mostly on woods. Right now, this time of year, they are filled with birds: blue jays, orioles, robins, cardinals, and many more. The woods are alive with the sound of bird music!!! And there are a couple of rabbits and a woodchuck that live out there as well.

The great escape for me takes seconds. A momentary glance in any direction, and I get a lift either from the beautiful view or the special memories associated with it. I am learning, in the midst of stress, to find release and relief in those brief partial moments. A student may be frustrating me or a parent yelling at me. I may feel physically trapped by the unpleasantness of the situation. But all I have to do is look up, or left or right, and I am flooded with renewed strength and energy. Those momentary escapes enable me to survive the sometimes-madness of the life that tends to lead me...

Still, there comes a time when a person needs more than a picture. That's what summers are for, I guess. Three more weeks!

4 comments:

Patty said...

I love winslow homer. Reminders of peace, keeps us activly searching for it. Without reminders we may just get so caught up in the rat race that we never get out of it, even if for just a moment. Sounds like you have surrounded yourself well with things to keep you grounded on the things that draw you towards special times of relaxing and good memories.

Sunny said...

What a soothing view through the window and on the sill.

Maybe if you played some background classical music in your office some of the students would find it soothing and get up more of an interest in music too. I've been trying to keep music in my ear (via MP3 player) while I do the household chores, yard work etc. It really enriches. Of course, mine is more like blue grass and smoky mountain gospel. My roots.

I remember when you went on the trip to France and folks were so astounded that you went ALONE!!! Hello, there is such a thing as NEEDING some solitary time. I hear you girl friend.

Patty said...

I was thinking about how we all used to have days at GBA when we would just gaze out the windows during class time. Certainly the wild woods were far more attention getting than some classes.

R. Aastrup said...

Yes! I'd forgotten that...but now that you mention it, I remember just sitting and looking and then writing. I loved teaching in our old English room (imgaine that!). I always had my chairs face the woods. Once, a red-tailed hawk flew down right in front of the windows and landed. We sat there for several minutes amazed at the up close and personal view. That was a great day!